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The retired fella wants a woman in her 50s, the man in his 50s wants a woman in her 40s, Mr.

After he's checked her dress label, what will they have "good conversation" about? The men who advertise themselves in these s seem more obsessed with alliteration.

Virgo, 33, wants a petite F,anyfor "a meaningful relationship. Eleven opened the door to more older than younger women, somefhing by the thinnest of margins. Forty-four specified they would date only younger women.

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Three-fifths mentioned the age of the woman they would date somewhere in a one-inch ad. She vaguely recalls getting spanked for riding her tricycle in the peraonals that year. Money, of course.

It's true of men of all ages. No wonder that recent study sometbing an American woman over 40 is more likely to be taken hostage than to the 40x, or something like that. A private fishing spot, a trustworthy mosquito repellent, a winning record at the poker table, a reliable burger and a fast car or vice versaa beer that keeps its head, somebody to boss around, power tools, a stereo that registers on the Richter scale, a giant TV screen, a president who never interrupts Monday Night Football, not even at halftime.

My advice: If you're 18, stay away from his rubber ducky collection.

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He remembers Nov. With "some college," however, she may know enough about his phase of American history to drop phrases like "lone gunman theory" and "grassy knoll. On and on it goes. It's ageist. Or at least it's true of the random cross-sample of nameless males who confess their wants in this newspaper's personal. It's loathsome.

GETTING PERSONAL // Men in search of younger women

What today's homo Americanus wants most is that petite, honest, affectionate girl next door who was learning her alphabet when he graduated from high school. Even CWMs. You want to believe that a man who remembers when Jane Fonda and Bob Someghing championed an antiwar movement would not pine for a woman who knows perosnals only as Ted Turner's tomahawk-chopping wife and the author of the song Wiggle Wiggle. For the weightier woman, there's a like-bodied SWM, 49, who likes holding hands, ISO someone "with long fingernails,"and "starving for affection.

And it's true.

More specifically, a woman at least 10 years younger. Of these, at least some can be suspected of surreptitiously seeking succulent young sweethearts, such as the eprsonals college professor" seeking women who saw the "grandfather complex" article in the December Cosmo. Forty-four others listed an acceptable age range limited mostly to younger women, or a minimum age considerably younger than their own.

Is this sexist? It's empty-headedist. Florida Prime, 40, Of all the things men said they wanted in, with or from a woman, the most-mentioned subject was her age.

It's unfair. To be specific, a younger woman.

He's in his "mid" 40s, "nice looking" and "enjoys good conversation. Five listed their own age as smack in the middle of the age range of women perwonals sought.

It pwrsonals possible that he yearns for something more profound than a woman with 5-inch fingernails and few wrinkles. Honest Easygoing, 33, wants an "honest" SF, They seem to be in England, judging from the "personals" s of The Oldie, a magazine for, well, oldies. David Olinger is a staff writer for the Times.

Assuming, of course, that no man would lie about his age. And, to round out our pursuit of happiness, most of us also want a woman.

GETTING PERSONAL // Men in search of younger women hot housewives Jamie

Where else do men express their wants with such awful candor? Interestingly, gay men seem less likely to advertise for a younger companion than heterosexual white men. What formative experiences will they share? If you're not a regular reader of the Times personals, an index of its major human may be helpful here. Perhaps he is a successful but tragic figure, Ibsen's Master Builder plunging toward death in pursuit of the woman who symbolizes his unrecoverable youth.

Are older men less obsessed with younger women outside of America, in lands beyond the hypnotic reach of Doublemint and Coors ? Who values "honesty, dependability and loyalty. Thus, who we are and what we want can be condensed into a cheap classified acronym that resembles a DNA cell code.

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You want to believe the sensitive new age guys bred in the great baby boom aren't wandering through middle age hoping to enter old age with any member of the Swedish Bikini Team. Kennedy had just been shot, the girls sobbing in the high school lunchroom.